Yapham May 2005



ACCC  v. Yapham CC      Yapham      Sunday 8th May 2005

ACCC 138 for 2 (32 overs)    P Brown 96 not out

Yapham  116 for 9 (32 overs(    M Brown 7-2-15-4, Crossland 5-1-14-2,

                                                            Beal 4-1-7-2, Flint 48, B Brown 31 not out

ACCC won by 22 runs


Yapham is one of our oldest and most pleasant fixtures; the setting is delightfully rural and our opponents are always generous hosts.  Unfortunately, as we play them early in the season the weather is often unreliable (we were unable to play at all last year due to rain) and so it proved again on Sunday.  No sooner had Sam mustered his troops (save for the late arriving Doctor Dave) and sorted out his batting order, than the heavens opened and we stood and watched the hail descend in a biting Northerly wind.  Nevertheless, we managed to get under way half an hour late and Noz got the Casuals batting account up and running for the season in the first over.  The Yapham team was notable for its youth and enthusiasm, I’m sure that they did not have one player over 25, while we had at least two over 55!

Noz was partnered by James Lockwood, an enterprising move by the skipper and one which ensured that the remainder of the team kept their eyes on the action (particularly Will who was batting at 3); James firmly believes that he has done well if he can last long enough to crack one boundary and demonstrate his ‘exaggerated leave’ stroke, sadly on this occasion he managed neither and departed in the 5th over.  Noz was batting as only he can and once joined by Will decided that ‘tip and run’ was the order for the day, this resulted in much scurrying and skidding about-turns in the middle of the still wet wicket as the Yapham boys missed several opportunities to run him out.  At least he kept the audience entertained and the fielders the chance to keep themselves warm on a raw afternoon.  By the time Will was out, attempting a lofted off-drive which he mistimed, Noz had moved onto 50 and Doctor Dave had arrived and was changed ready for action.  However, the rain had begun to fall once again and before Sam could reach the middle the Umpires took the teams off.  During the enforced break the two skippers decided that we should take an early tea and reduce the game to 32 overs per side.  The tea was excellent and taken with much good humoured banter by the Casuals; main topics of conversation were Spike’s increasing waistline, Duncan’s attempts to look sophisticated whilst eating, in order to impress his new girl friend and the exact nature of the role to be played by Doctor Dave, given that he had arrived 40 minutes late, had yet to bat and had to leave by 5 o’clock to get back in time for a concert in Shepley! 

Play resumed with the skipper now at the wicket and looking in ominously good nick; he and Noz were going along very nicely when Sam received a high full toss from the opposing skipper, unfortunately Sam top edged it into his face and instead of sailing over the mid-wicket fence for 6 the ball inflicted a nasty cut over his right eye. With blood streaming from the wound our brave skipper left the field of play to be whisked off to A & E at York General, by Susanne. Stewart took his place and I suspect that the Yapham skipper, now full of remorse over the incident, may have thought that Stewart was over reacting when coming out to bat in full body armour and helmet!  I noticed at that point that Doctor Dave was padded up and prowling the boundary edge, keen to do his bit for the cause and no doubt hoping for another wicket to fall – no such luck because there then followed one of the great stands of recent Casuals innings. With only a handful of overs left Noz was mindful of the need to get every run on offer, besides which he was heading for a deserved century; as a result Stewart was encouraged, cajoled and bullied to run at every opportunity and he responded magnificently to the challenge despite almost being ‘lapped’ by Noz when running a two and being in need of an oxygen tent by the end of the innings. Despite his best efforts Noz failed to score the 4 he needed off the last ball and remained undefeated on 96 – not exactly a chanceless innings but a fantastic effort in the conditions. Doctor Dave took off his pads and prepared himself for 10 minutes fielding.

With Sam still away at the hospital, Will took over leading the side in the field and ignoring pleading looks from Doctor Dave, threw the ball to Matthew (Brown) to open from the cow field end. His first ball was a snorter and the unfortunate Yapham batsman had hardly moved before his off stump was sent cartwheeling.  Bill joined in the fun from the road end and wickets fell at regular intervals to such an extent that by the end of  the 13th over Yapham were in complete disarray at 28 for 7; 3 wickets for Matthew, 2 for Bill and 2 for Dave Beal. At some point during the mayhem Doctor Dave departed the field of dreams for the long drive back to Shepley – his contribution duly noted by his teamates.

Eventually Will took pity on the Yapham batsmen and provided them with some respite by bringing on Stewart (now with his breath back) and Spike (now finished all the cakes and chocolate biscuits he’d stuffed in his pockets at tea time). This allowed Yapham to forge a recovery and by the 25th over they had got to 88 without further loss, however in the next over Duncan produced his surprise straight one and Flint departed for a fighting 48. Matthew came back to ensure the victory with one more wicket and the Casuals left the field in high spirits to be greeted by their now patched up skipper and headed for the pub to celebrate.

N.B.  Apologies for lack of photo’s this week, but as recompense here’s a piece that I have reproduced from the Sunday Times ‘Top Ten Fictional Sporting Heroes’.

“The Amazing Wilson – A Wizard character, the Amazing Wilson’s origins were obscure, but some catastrophe meant he had to wear a tight black woolen costume and live outdoors.  Oh, and he was immortal, unbeatable in any sport and “invented” the Fosbury flop, shortly after winning the Ashes for England.  His existence was akin to the life of an ascetic monk, which, this being 1943, helped wartime propaganda with its hints that if we exercised, dressed in homo-erotic fashion and were immortal, the Nazis would be beaten.”

It can’t be just a coincidence – can it?